In my last year of highschool, I was kinda the popular girl that all the guys wanted to date. I was known to be delicate and feminine but also someone whose looks always seems perfect. My secret was wearing only three things: concealer, lipstick.lipbalm and a waterproof mascara from Maybelline. No matter what it never smudges. Anyway, I had a BIG HUGE GRAND crush on this beautiful guy and I am sure I was the love of his life at that time. We will stare at each other and lose the time around us.
It was a normal day (I thought) where I had no more of my magic mascara so I used a regular one. We had physical education and you will think “oh Mimi your mascara must just smudged a bit an that’s why you are embarrassed? that’s no big deal”. No dear, it didn’t smudge a bit. I turned into a clown meeting a zombie meeting raccoon. Why? because of all days, it rained and this is not the worst part. The worst part is that I was so used to my perfect mascara that I didn’t notice so when my crush asked me to fix something on his hair. I was on my tiptoe looking at him lovingly and trying to use my charms thinking I look sexy because of the rain and my wet hair but I just looked like a dead panda. He couldn’t look away from me. I thought “omg he must find me beautiful” the poor guy was terrified. The problem is that I was acting all pretty when I looked everything but pretty. kjdkjzhfkujhfjsb. But I learned two things from this: To be humble and check the weather before going out in the morning.
FAKE LOVE: Has someone ever broken your heart or you broke someone’s heart? if so tell us the story
I never broke someone’s heart intentionally but I had my heart broken by that one person. I was pretty young, maybe 14. It was the time I first started to talk to people online. And only 90’s kids will recall but there was something called MSN on PC (Do you guys recall the wizz lol now I feel old hahaha). So that guy became a friend. It was the first guy who loved me for me or at least that’s what I thought. Because that happened before I knew how to style myself and have some self-confidence. At the time I wasn’t called pretty. I had no fashion sense, no makeup, no hair products, nothing. For me, clothes were what my mom bought me and makeup was something adults will wear as for my hair I left my bed’s pillow to do its job of the hair stylist. I wasn’t ugly I just wasn’t attractive enough for the other gender. But again how can people be attracted to me when I wasn’t even interested in myself. That’s why it’s important to love oneself, kids. Only then you will shine. So back to the boy. Contrary to me at the time. He was handsome with his blue eyes and silky hair. And what will make you even mad was that he was cool as he was into sports. That perfect, manga like protagonist side of him attracted me. But what made me like him was how kind he was to me. This same boy I called kind and sweet will turn to be a liar who played me like a game. Want me to cut the story short? He had a girlfriend. Want me to tell you what’s even worse? He talked to me about her. Want me to tell you what’s even sadder? He said she was just a friend. Want me to tell you what’s even more depressing? This fool believed him until the day my neurons nudged up from their coma and decided to work and tell me to wake up from my lovely dream. My heart quickly healed but I learned my lesson young. And thanks to that I became the confident person I am today.
As a kid, I was so weird (I still am lol) when many dreamed to be doctors, astronauts, lawyers, be like their dad or mom … I just wanted to be loved. My dream was to receive genuine love from people. I was too kind as a kid and people mistook my kindness as fakeness or were using me then throwing me away. And it seemed like nothing to adults at the time because it was just like using my favorite crayons and never giving them back (but crayons were my treasure at the time) or breaking my favorite toy and never saying sorry or stealing my beloved story then coming with a lie that it disappeared. Adults called it “it’s just kids thing”. But I was being used and felt lonely at such a young age. At the age of 9, I still recall writing on a paper “I just wanna be loved why is it so easy for everyone and so hard for me? I just want some real friends? why does everyone hate me? Should I just disappear?”. At the time my parents weren’t as understanding as today and my bigger family didn’t like me because as a child I was quite smart and outsmarted them, so tricks that you would do on kids wouldn’t work on me. They will in front of me say in another language that I already mastered “what an unwanted kid” … it hurt.
But I am happy now and very loved by many so you can say I found my paradise and my dream did come true. Also, I learned that you can’t be loved by everyone and that you need to be yourself so that people who will love you for you will appear ^^. Now I am all shy after sharing this
MimiBTSGhost 